true and real actually
going to dvc was still a massive improvement over being in the game though, it was just. an absolute mindfuck because i had been out there feeling i was obviously on the right side of things and people were being completely insane and dvc would see that and then. 
absolute biggest mindfuck of all time genuinely
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yeah i remember this, tho iād forgotten the sunbae bit if i ever knew it lol, but i remember the amrock stuff
the other funny part in retrospect was that the collective resulting dvc read was amrock/ara/hally/me all lock wolves and like. literally 2-3 of the non dvc spewed ones were wrong! it wasnt even just me LMAO
i think that people did not understand the nature of the dynamic around me that i was having to operate in that game, from outside of it and in the massive muddle of posts that is anni. which is definitely like. Fair. But it was a thing where like. Fmpov, I do not feel bad at all for getting tangled up in amrock and araās powerwolfing there, in the sense that like. Iām not going to say I take zero responsibility because that would be a bit silly, but it was an extremely direct product of them being some of the only people willing to have, like, a reasonable fucking conversation with me.
But I can understand how it looked from outside if you donāt understand the nuances of How We Got There lol
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ya it was pretty insane levels of warping lol
Iāve showed my face for less.
I think this was probably the only thing that could have reasonably been done to stop it, but itās a much easier call to make in retrospect than in the moment indeed
I at least when I went in there was able to hold to interpreting it through a lens of like. Not taking it as reasonable to put it on me when the rest of the village, frankly, basically created the dynamic that resulted in me powerwolfing with wolf amrock and ara as a villager, effectively drove me to working with amrock in that way by treating me so badly lol. So it wasnāt like I took anyone giving me shit or whatever for being tangled up in that to heart, I donāt think, Iām reasonablyyyy sure I just thought they were all equally insane. It was just a complete mindfuck to go in there expecting freedom/relief and empathy from the insanity and insteadā¦ That lmao. I expected to go in there and have people understand the position I was in and they very much did not.
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it was frustrating to not have the reassurance and understanding and shit about the time i was having and position i was in when i went to dvc, but it wasnāt cause i thought they were being reasonable or that they werent insane too, it was just incredibly jarring and also just sucked to not even in dvc have a place where people understood wtf happened
i ended up just talking with voxx in dms for a while that morning after going to dvc bc dvc was like. idk i didnt wanna be in there at first. im not sure how much i actually read when i first joined it after that first stretch tbh. i dont super remember
I mean fundamentally this entire expectation WAS in some part inherently predicated on the idea that I was obviously a villager experiencing this, the two expectations/dissonances were pretty fundamentally intertwined etc
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Like it was straight up just a. Wtf else was I supposed to even do? There was nothing. Village literally chased me into amrocks pocket by being ranging from unreasonable to straight up dicks to me more and more over the course of the game and more and more as the handful of villagers able to truly level me out died at night
Genuinely, I donāt think there was any other thing that was particularly reasonable for me to do there LMAO but I suspect that this entire understanding required a breadth and depth of both information and understanding that was a lot harder to have if you were not me.
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i donāt really think that excuses being mean
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Oh 100% not
tbc that line was specifically talking about the players in DVC who had me as a lock wolf but werenāt really doing anything wrong or mean in how they talked about it or anything, they just didnāt understand how miserable of a time I was having because they lacked a full grasp of thread context so they didnāt have the full breadth of information to realize how as a villager I basically had no other available line than getting pocketed by amrock.
I do not excuse anyone who was being a dick to me in that game thread for it whatsoever lol
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Eh thatās tame compared to a few roles I can think off the top of my head.
Yet you have been really mean to me today, what is your excuse
Have you tried sleeping better?
It is so miserable being ill
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Has a role Iāve made ever been hated? Did people hate FAM5 and FAM6 roles speak now tell me what you hated
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Most of the ones I can think of are accidental VTs which isnāt the same
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I need to start making bold choices so people hate me
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I donāt think Iāve made a role thatās been hated