I fuck up academic stuff all the time I just don’t care. If I retake the class I retake the class. If I fail out of college I fail out of college. All there is to do is plan from there. I know I am doing my best and that is all there is to do
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towny mindset
ngl as much as this mindset sounds helpful in. being happy i don’t think I could ever do it
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Mafia is the one exception which is why it’s so addicting to me. It’s the one place where consequences register. Winning and losing are so immediate and discrete as outcomes that I can actually conceptualise them
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so. you didn’t have to train yourself to not worry?
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I have severe ADHD it’s literally just that. I have a complete inability to conceptualise the future. Or the past. Time blindness
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oh
I was wondering “hmmmm is this a May Mindset that I can absorb nya nya nya”
probably not given that bthbthbthtbhtbthbthbthtbhtbhtb
i procrastinate but i worry about it 
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Sometimes I kind of manage to get into it when there’s a discrete yes/no immediate consequence thing: I occasionally felt some level of worry about college acceptance letters, for example.
But then I thought about it, and I realised there was nothing I could do to change things at that point, and I realised that there was no outcome which would literally kill me, so it all seemed manageable.
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The idea of time blindness is forgiej to me
But I suppose being able to see with two eyes pointing at the same thing at the same time sI also forgiej to me
I remember my eye doctor going “hey we can fix that yoy just may have double vision for a while” and I was like “why should we fix it this has caused zero problems and it’s not like I feel like I’m missing out on anything”
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So I don’t know if I’m time blinded
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i’m a chronic procrastinator and it’s such a huge massive problem
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same nya
I was told I should be having a hard time seeing in 3d but it’s fucking 3d it’s literally our world I don’t know what fourth dimension power you guys are seeing into with proper eyes but I doubt anything changes
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obviously idk what things look like to you but
as someone with normal eyes, closing 1 eye and looking out the other significantly breaks depth perception
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Absorbing mays is dangerous stuff you need to be cautious about
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Like I do feel worry on some level sometimes when things are immediate enough for my brain to grasp them, and that’s when the actual mindset stuff comes in.
There is nothing to do but my best. If I can change it, then I will do that. If I can’t change it, no need to worry.
If it gets really bad, I just take the worst case scenario, pretend it has already happened, and then plan out for it. And then it doesn’t feel foreign and scary. In middle school I’d go “okay, well what if my parents find out I’m gay and kick me out of the house even though there’s no evidence that would happen. Well I have friends online I could ask around for spare rooms with my phone or a library computer. I could ask a neighbour to drive me to the bus stop so I could get there.” etc etc et al and once I’m in the scenario and know what I’d do I don’t fear it. Because you can’t fear the present
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I do that all the time and I don’t notice any difference
My theory is my brain has compensated for this like brains are good at
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Oh I also have bad depth perception I think
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Like when I look at one thing I can only look at it with one eye my other eye is doing something else which allows me to switch eyes it’s funny but I don’t see any difference with covering an eye so it’s probably an illusion and that’s how I see depth because my mind is compedanting
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i have started absorbing May’s thing of analyzing unpleasant feelings and thereby finding them interesting
I often forget to do it but it’s pretty cool
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